SPALENKA EYE

The inner life of a girl becoming a woman, spirals downward like roots feeling their way through dark soil, and upward like sap rising in a tree.

In the language of author, and Jungian Psychoanalyst, Clarissa Pinkola Estés, the girl enters the forest of story—where wolves speak, and the bones of instinct remember. Author and psychologist Sharon Blackie would call it the rooted remembering—an awakening of self, and ancestry carried in blood and the land.

Something within the girl begins to split— into awareness. Author, Sue Monk Kidd names this the moment when the life she has been living no longer fits the life that is quietly arriving. Estés would call it the silencing of instinct; Blackie, the ache of exile from belonging.

And yet author, Melinda Reidinger Ph.D. reminds us that voice is often returned through witnessing—through story shared, through being seen by another. In that fragile moment something ancient stirs. Whether understood as ancestral memory, carried through generations like hidden code, or as the deeper mystery of a soul that has crossed many forms of existence, the feeling is the same: recognition without explanation.

The girl becoming a woman is remembering a self she has never fully met.

Cathy Skipper (Educator and Life Coach) listens to this language—the intelligence of cycles, plants, decay, and sees it as a preparation. Hildegard von Bingen sang of viriditas, the greening force moving through all living things. “The soul is in the body as sap is in the tree,” she wrote—an image of quiet, persistent rising. In this light, it becomes a sacred and devotional moment.

All of this gathers in the story of White Deer: Rites of Passage, where the white deer appears as both question and answer, both guide and threshold. Does it represent instinct born of myth; or a call to descend; or the whisper of inner authority?

Blackie would recognize in it the presence of land itself—alive, listening, responding.

Skipper would feel it in the body’s subtle knowing, while Reidinger would insist that it functions as a messenger of re-enchantment, seen or felt when perception shifts. While the deer moves between worlds without hesitation, the girl is fearful, yet compelled to trust this guide, because something in her already does.

And so the journey deepens.

What begins as a disorientating woodland, becomes a path of initiation; what feels like loss of innocence reveals itself as intuitive power. The girl begins to listen inward, around, and behind—where memory, ancestry, and something like eternity hums beneath her skin. Across these woven voices, she is being gathered back into what she has always been—layer by layer, story by story, life by life.

Her inner light leads the way.

• Clarissa Pinkola Estés — Women Who Run With the Wolves

• Sharon Blackie — If Women Rose Rooted

• Sue Monk Kidd — The Dance of the Dissident Daughter

• Cathy Skipper — The Alchemy of Menopause

• Melinda Reidinger — The White Deer: Ecospirituality and the Mythic

• Hildegard von Bingen — Sciviasa

The above art is called, “Dancing Flame”. Graphite, Acrylic, Oil Paint, Ink, Gold Leaf, Tape, Transparencies, Glue, Varnish, on Hearth Charm Card AP.

My two day Premodern Charm Artist Proof Auctions on the Magic the Gathering Artist Proof Cards Facebook Group page have been a blast!

I created the art for the Premodern, 1997 Charm Cycle—one of Magic’s earliest expressions of five-color design. Recently, I came across the Magic the Gathering Artist Proof Cards Facebook Group and noticed all the artists and reps sharing and selling Artist Proofs. APs are the cards that have no printing on the back of the card and artists create art on them for fans, patrons and collectors.

The MTG Vision Charm 1997 Series

I received commissions over the years to sign and make some art on cards but never really pursued it. Then I was pointed to this Facebook Group and thought I would see what would happen if I auctioned some cards there for fun. I have offered three of my five Charm Cards and each has blown me over with the bidding wars. Now I am hooked in, and intend to roll out one card a week.

You can see it HERE. The auctions begin on Saturday around 2:00 PM, EST and end the next day on Sunday at 9:00 PM, EST. Check it out, especially the last 15 minutes, where there is usually a bidding war. It is exciting to see fans battle it out to gain a treasure for their collection.

The above art is called, “Goddess Carries the Dawn”. Graphite, Acrylic, Oil Paint, Ink, Gold Leaf, Tape, Transparencies, Glue, on Hope Charm Card AP.

I see MTG cards not just as a game, but also as talismans for growth and understanding similar to the way Tarot or Oracle cards are used. So, I approach the art I make on these cards as magical iconic symbols, not just an image to complement the card.

It is a beautiful thing to see how loyal MTG players are and their support for artists like myself.

Creating Art for the Premodern, Magic the Gathering

1997 Charm Cycle & auctions for my Artist Proofs

Every week I intend to premier one Magic the Gathering Artist Proof (White Back) card from my early Charm Cycle with a one of kind multi-media piece of art on it. The card art above was for the back of a Funeral Charm which I titled, “Death is a Beginning.”

The auction is on the Magic the Gathering Artist Proof Cards Facebook Group. It begins on Saturday 2:00 PM, EST and ends the next day Sunday 10:00 PM, EST.

I created the art for the Premodern, 1997 Charm Cycle—one of Magic’s earliest expressions of five-color design. There are five charms in this series. I was commissioned with Wizards of the Coast through my connection with Allen Spiegel Fine Arts at the San Diego Comic Con when the game was just starting. Now MTG is a worldwide phenomena with conventions and festivals in 16 locations across the globe.

The MTG Vision Charm 1997 Series

I have been asked by fans to sign cards for decades! I did not sell much personal art on my artist proofs but now with the resurgence of the Premodern MTG sets these cards are back. I am grateful because I put a lot of love into these APs, along with underlying alchemical symbolism and Spalenka mojo! Some past commissions below-

I see MTG cards not just as a game, but also as talismans for growth and understanding similar to the way Tarot or Oracle cards are used. So, I approach the art I make on these cards as magical iconic symbols, not just an image to complement the card.

The Funeral card can be read as dark magic associated with death, fear, and decay, which matches black mana’s themes in the game, but conversely it can also represent transformation through endings. Black mana in Magic is often misunderstood as only evil; philosophically, it also represents acceptance of mortality, ambition, adaptation, and the willingness to change through loss.

Inspired by the quiet grace and bittersweet wisdom embodied by Death, the character from The Sandman graphic novels (which I created some art for), this original art for the Funeral Charm captures the inevitability and dignity in mortality that she represents– the fragile space between endings and transformation.

I am committed to offering one art filled card per week for auction on the Magic the Gathering Artist Proof Cards Facebook Group for now, so check it out if you are a fan of the game! It is amazing how loyal MTG players are and their support for artists like myself.

If you are interested in Signed Magic Cards, or Altered Magic Cards please go HERE to learn more and purchase.

Below are two more artist proof commissions.

"Like Alice in Wonderland, a girl must face the fears standing between her, and who she’s becoming."

This early experimental trailer showcases some highlights of White Deer: Rites of Passage. A graphic novel, an animated film, a symphonic musical soundtrack, an art exhibition, a communal dialogue, and now a potential immersive dome show! 

All these creative parts synergistically compliment each other. Using immersive dome technology, the story becomes a ritual for the subconscious, inviting us to ask: Who am I, and who am I becoming? It gently reminds us that the challenges of growing up—especially for girls transitioning from childhood to adolescence, can become allies that strengthen our inner resolve.

Join the dialogue and support this epic art project.  Every month I present a Zoom session where I share the evolution of the story, art, animation and music, along with interviews of interesting people. Sign up for my newsletter to learn more.

The Evolution of Story, Graphic Novel & Animated Film 

White Deer: Rites of Passage began as a mythic poem that was downloaded from the æthers. At its center was a twelve-year-old girl aware of life changes coming her way, yet not ready to accept them. The poem unfolded as a rite of passage. I felt the emotion of transformation within these words. In this story, growing up became a fairy tale, rich with symbolic hallucinations. From poem, to graphic novel, to animated film; I was feeling my way through, confronting my fears, and allowing spirit to push me beyond my limitations.

To translate the poem into visual form, I created rough storyboards for a graphic novel. Page after page told the fantastical story of the girl’s resistance to adolescence, using sequential imagery. My background in film as a concept designer shaped this process: events formed scenes, scenes accumulated into chapters, chapters became acts. Panels and pages were equivalent to cuts in the editing room.

Character and environmental designs brought the story to life. Some places were earth bound as in the forest, other locations were ethereal and psychedelic. Visual strategies such as flat, middle, and deep space, along with perspective and color scripting enhanced the narrative meaning, adding to the emotional focus.

The transition to animation introduced chance and possibility. Using AI animation programs, I began animating panels of art and pages from the graphic novel. Most of the results were unusable, but sometimes they were striking. In some ways the unevenness mirrored the story; adolescence as an awkward, uncontrollable transformation. The process required patience and repetition, yielding occasional visual “gems.”

All these fragments were brought together in the film editing program of Final Cut Pro, where they were assembled into loose sequences. As this was an animation experiment, it became a constellation of moments connected through rhythm, and metaphor. Editing became an act of listening, allowing meaning to emerge through juxtaposition. You can see a snippet of the early editing at the top of the page.

(The next step in this process is to pull together an animation team, which is happening now. I intend to mentor and invite talented students here in Santa Fe to join. More on this later.)

I also began introducing musical elements from my early score, testing how sound and image interacted. (James Raymond will be producing the final musical score with me. More on this later.) Even in the stripped-down, experimental trailer, it was clear that something magical was emerging. The work revealed its potential, reflecting the same transformative process that had guided the project from poem to graphic novel to animated film. Just like alchemy, just like me.

Large art spread for the White Deer: Rites of Passage graphic novel

Time and the Sacred Cycles of Life

When the clock strikes twelve and it’s time to end
We’ll start to rockin’ round the clock again
We’re gonna rock around the clock tonight
We’re gonna rock, gonna rock around the clock tonight

As I rock around the clock to accomplish the many facets of White Deer: Rites of Passage– creating the graphic novel, composing the musical score, exploring the animation, I came to the realization that this story is also a meditation on the cycles of time as they shape our life and consciousness. The white deer, long revered across cultures as a sacred being, functions as a guide for change. When one’s identity dissolves and another begins, time becomes cyclical. Life unfolds through repeating patterns of birth, death, and renewal.

Childhood, adolescence, adulthood, old age are recurring initiations that mirror larger rhythms moving through nature and the cosmos itself.

Art for the White Deer: Rites of Passage graphic novel

At the microcosmic level, White Deer emphasizes our personal transformations. The transition from childhood to adolescence, for example, is marked by bodily changes, emotional turbulence, and the awakening of personal identity. Motherhood represents another profound initiation—one that reshapes the body, and reorients time around the responsibility for new life. Old age is framed as an age of reflection, wisdom. Each passage requires surrender to change, guided by inner signals much like the white deer’s presence in the forest of the psyche.

These personal cycles are inseparable from the macrocosmic forces that surround and influence human life. Environmental seasons and astronomical cycles provide the larger clock within which individual lives unfold. The waxing and waning of the moon, the turning of the equinoxes, and the slow procession of the stars remind us that human development echoes cosmic motion. Astrological symbolism, often embedded in rites of passage traditions, reinforces the idea that personal transformation can align with celestial patterns. Growth is harmonizing with a universal rhythm.

Art for the White Deer: Rites of Passage graphic novel

The vast cycles of time reflected in the ancient Indian concept of the yugas, (roughly 24,000 years), describes the rise and fall of consciousness across ages, from periods of spiritual clarity to times of materialism and forgetting. Just as civilizations evolve and renew, so too does the individual across a lifetime. The white deer stands as a timeless witness, crossing eras and dimensions, reminding us that our personal journeys are embedded within far greater arcs of change.

Ultimately, White Deer: Rites of Passage presents time as a living, dancing spiral. As I rock around the clock of life, swaying with the cosmic cycles, my microcosm blends with the macrocosm. Learning to move gracefully through time is to recognize that I am both a singular being and a participant in the vast, ever-renewing rhythms of existence.

Time to dance!

Transforming the Identities that No Longer Serve Us

Some truths do not arrive gently. They hover at the edge of our vision, waiting for the moment we can no longer look away. Growing up is one such truth. So is the realization that a substance (alcohol, drugs, etc.), once chosen freely, has begun to choose us instead. In both moments, awareness precedes acceptance, and denial becomes a temporary refuge.

Mythologist, Sharon Blackie writes that the heroine’s journey begins with dislocation, a sense that our old identity no longer fits. “White Deer: Rites of Passage”was born from this space where the soul knows what the mind refuses. The symbol of the white deer embodies the moment when avoidance fails, calling the self toward a transformation.

The poem opens in a dream like state...

“I awoke, but my eyes were sleeping…”

The “ghost white deer” steps forward as an omen, marking the end of innocence. Blackie describes this as the necessary rupture of the heroine’s path. Childhood fades. Illusions fracture. What once felt eternal, reveals itself as temporary. Once experienced, this threshold cannot be crossed back over. Whether the truth is the end of childhood, or the presence of addiction, the soul has crossed a boundary.

Many times the next response is refusal.

“This looming fate was much too near / I have no wish to face this fear.”

*Spread from the White Deer: Rites of Passage graphic novel

Blackie reminds us that the heroine may resist transformation. Avoiding adulthood and denying addiction both arise from the same fear: that identity will be stripped away. When the girl cries,

“Growing old is not for me,”

it speaks for every truth we flee. This is the flight stage, the instinct to outrun becoming. Innocence, after all, is seductive. In the poem this, “mystic trance” softens reality, blurs consequence, and wraps us in the illusion of safety. Childhood promises protection; denial promises control. Yet the deer speaks what Blackie teaches again and again: the adversary is not an external force, it is internal.

“I am you and you are me / This mortal dress of reality.”

Psychotherapist, Dr. Nicki Monti, shares that the story we carry about ourselves becomes the world we inhabit. The narratives we repeat of fear, limitation, and avoidance shape the life we live, unless we consciously rewrite them. If we do not tell a different story, she says, we continue to enact the old one, carrying the beliefs of the past into our present and future.

*Spread from the White Deer: Rites of Passage graphic novel

Many of us grew up with the belief that youth was a sanctuary, that denial was a shelter. Monti emphasizes that spiritual transformation requires more than wishing for a new ending; it demands choosing, speaking, and living a new story again and again, even if the old one still clings.

In the hall of antlers, inhabited by witnesses and wisdom, our heroine learns that fear can become a teacher, avoidance a bridge, and courage a natural extension of our confidence. Initiation is a door to spiritual growth.

The initiation begins when the new story is claimed. Blackie teaches that the heroine’s wisdom is earned through surrender, not conquest; by attuning to body, place, and ancestral knowing.

When the girl is exhausted, kneeling within the temple, an imposing White Deer approaches her. Its intentions are unkown. Soon it became clear that this mysterious and ethereal creature, bowing before her, is not a threat or a judge. It is a mirror and a guide.

“Truth unveiled my inner light,”

*Art panel from the White Deer: Rites of Passage graphic novel.

We are reminded of the empowerment that is hidden beneath our fears. Our new story is to align with the soul’s call. Allow transformation to unfold, and unfold, and unfold...

“I am change that’s still becoming.”

This is the quiet truth of adulthood, of recovery, of spiritual awakening. Fear might remain, but its grip has loosened. Monti and Blackie converge here: the rewriting of our story fuels the deep work of integration, strengthening a new narrative.

Lastly, comes the return– not to innocence, but to sovereignty.

“Girl and woman reconciled… I am Sovereign, Eternal, Free.”

The story I told myself no longer serves me; I now step fully into the story I choose to live. 

White Deer: Rites of Passage” affirms that when we stop running from truth—whether the truth of age, addiction, or of our inner voice—we step into the full possibility of who we have always been, as well as who we are becoming. The story we tell ourselves becomes a life aligned with courage, love, and authenticity.

Animation test for the White Deer: Rites of Passage animated film.

We yearn to understand, and find meaning in the transitional periods of our life.

How imagination and ritual help us answer the question: "Who am I Becoming"?

A mythic poem is a type of story that usually draws on mythology. Tales of gods, goddesses, heroes, creation, and the supernatural, exploring deep cultural, spiritual, or existential themes. Symbolism and archetypes are used to ask big questions about human purpose, the universe, or timeless truths. White Deer: Rites of Passage reflects some of these facets, but it is also a type of new myth or myth-invocation. Fusing fairy tale like lore in the poem, with contemporary concerns like adolescence, serves as an allegory and a ritual.

I was surprised this prose manifested so quickly, along with an impulse to produce this as a multi-media production. A symbolic story of transition from childhood to adult was not on my list of things to do, but I listened to my intuition and dove in. Soon, the graphic novel started coming together, the music began taking shape, animation experiments were encouraging, new artwork was manifesting, along with other auspicious magical happenings.

Recently, I learned that the US is in the midst of a major mental health crisis, and it hits young girls the hardest.

• Depression rates are skyrocketing.

• Self-harm hospitalizations for girls aged 10–14 are increasing at an alarming rate.

• Suicide attempts by young girls have risen dramatically.

We have a strong indigenous presence here in New Mexico and I researched more about the history and psychological benefits of ritual specifically in these cultures. Initiation practices are used to create a safe and empowering space for life changes, for girls and boys around the planet, but have mostly been lost in modern societies. Rites of Passage are crafted to include the greater community, to widen the awareness, and produce a net of protection instilling more confidence in youth. Maybe modern life has lost the artful support of growing up?

The White Deer: Rites of Passage poem focuses on a young heroine’s challenge with growing up, but this journey mirrors transitions of all ages.

It asks the question: Who am I becoming?

How many of you have asked yourself this question in your entire life?

It is within this self inquiry that the poem becomes a ritual. Introspection begins the process of self realization.

I am more!

I am still forming.

I am unfolding my magnificence.

Innocence is not lost because of growth, it can transform into powerful intuition. Like the symbol of the White Deer this wisdom can guide us to see the sacred qualities that reside within us, and better understand our place in the world.

Animation test for the White Deer: Rites of Passage animated film.

WHITE DEER: RITES OF PASSAGE

by Greg Spalenka

At the heart of nature’s core

A truth awaits, forevermore

That life’s enchantment never ends

We evolve, transform, transcend

Innocence is a mystic trance

Childhood’s eternal dance

Where laughter echoes, free and bright

Hearts whispering with delight

Childhood Dream

I awoke, but my eyes were sleeping

Lucid, and yet still was dreaming,

There was a pond, an ancient mirror

A girl, then a ghost white deer

Startled by this vision,

An omen’s premonition

A message for me foretold

Be ready, be strong, be bold

Forever young, in morning light

Waxing old at twilight

Growing up is a heavy weight

The weary burden of our fate

This rite of passage – girl to crone

Ancient wisdom, we learn to own

This looming fate was much too near

I have no wish to face this fear

The sun, reborn in its glory

Renewed its symphonic story

My dream vanished like morning dew

Radiance lit a youthful view

Fauna played, birds alighted

Worlds of dark and light collided

While mushrooms rose in sodden nooks

Berries grew by babbling brooks

Innocence is a mystic trance

In light of day, where shadows dance

The gifts of nature can be found

In verdant woods of fabled ground

Maiden Dance

To enter this hallowed forest,

and feel one with nature’s chorus

I summon a story yet untold

Of love and courage, brave and bold

The ancient trees whispered tales

of triumphs, struggles, and travails

Then rustling leaves, a gentle voice

invited me to make a choice

With basket trembling in my hand

I ventured forth, a soul unplanned

Forgetting fears and doubts untold

Watching the forest’s heart unfold

In awe, I lingered at the sight,

Of Fae weaving a banquet bright

They beckoned with a loving plea:

“Seek our wonders, endlessly.”

As I journeyed through its core

the woodland whispered, evermore

of love and wisdom, intertwined

in every leaf, in every vine

The air pulsed with energy

A sweet glimpse of divinity

Amidst the singing Fae, I twirled

Turning gently between our worlds

No Escape

Then an apparition darted

Startling my heart unguarded

A shrouded specter very near

Bearing antlers sharp, severe

Dream and reality blended

A beast, full of grace descended

Stirring depths within the soul

It was time to fulfill my role

“No, no, no,” my veins pumped wildly

As I fled the forest blindly

Out of the trees I quickly raced

Escaping the threads of my fate

Over dark Arcadian hills

On ridges, veiled in misty chills

Sprinting, my breath a frantic breeze

Growing old is not for me

Behind me floats the ghostly terror

Chanting evolution’s error

A phantom presence, dark and light

Echoing like a stormy night

“I am you and you are me

This mortal dress of reality”

I ran from my future dreams

Through valleys, cliffs, turbulent streams

Then I halted, on a mossy slope

By a temple adorned with hope

Courage of Alchemy

Pillared arches made of antlers

Ancient sentinels of pure bleached bone

Marveling at this wondrous sight

I fell into its blinding light

On hands and knees within this hall

I am reduced to humbled awe

In the distance a ghostly cloud

A White Deer clan, royal, proud

Earth guardians steadfast and true

Protecting secrets, known by few

Between the columns majestic, timeless

Symbols of strength, resilience, grace

One stepped forward, eyes ablaze

A divine mystery displayed

White as the snow that gently falls,

Its coat aglow, like moonbeams

Bowing low in benediction

Its prayer revealed my afflictions

Opening these eyes to see

Fearless, is who I am to be

Phantom menace, White Deer call

The mind’s bright mirror reflects it all

A thousand lives illuminate

I watch the weave of time create

Facing the lightning, fierce and bright

Truth unveiled my inner light

Gone is dread, the shadows cunning

I am change that’s still becoming

“Awe” breaks the silent air

“Oh,” now truth is shining there

“Mmm…” the circle’s finally spun

In harmony, we merge as one

Again the noble sage bowed low

Then raised me high with its antlers

Upon its head I stood aloft

Exalted, I am a living crown

Courage and strength within me stirred

No longer a victim of destiny

I felt the surge of alchemy

A miracle, my body changed

The blood of passion awakened

My spirit no longer forsaken

I danced through the passing darkness

Igniting a sunrise within me

Human essence, animal lore

Revealed a truth forevermore

Immortal, full of grace am I

Fierce love with life’s battle cry

At this shrine, I found resolve

To face the future and evolve

A metamorphosis, strange and grand

An enchanted song in nature’s hand

Now I stand, symbol of the wild

Girl and woman reconciled

Not only Goddess, do I see

I am Sovereign, Eternal, Free

This video reflects printing sessions focused on art from the White Deer - Rites of Passage graphic novel. In all of these meetings with master printer, Jennifer Lynch, I have learned the classical approach of this printing format, but also pushed the limits of what is possible with this ancient technology. Pulling the print off the plate is always full of anticipation and a surprising reveal. Sometimes its discouraging, other times its magical. All of it fills me with gratitude, as I dive deep, connecting old mastery with new visions.

In the spirit of sharing the magic, I am offering three of these one of a kind artworks for sale! This is the first opportunity to own one of these new pieces of original art from White Deer - Rites of Passage, and support the evolution of my largest art endeavor to date. Archival and hot of the press with real printers ink! Click on the image or the title to purchase.
 

Sunrise #1
30"x22" Photopolymer Print, Printers Ink on Archival Watercolor Paper



Sunrise #3
30"x22" Photopolymer Print, Printers Ink on Archival Watercolor Paper



White Deer Dream #1
30"x22" Photopolymer Print, Printers Ink on Archival Watercolor Paper